Saturday, April 11, 2015

i am having a quarter life crisis so i wrote this depressing post

18 and in limbo
too young to drink
but old enough to die for our country

it's midnight and my mind won't shut off
tick tock tick tock life is a clock
tick tock tick tock I just want time to stop

time to trade crayons for ballpoint pens
fruit loops for raisin bran
disney for cnn
innocence for the world on your shoulders

graduation is a funeral
we put on our sunday best
and watch our childhood die
those plastered on grins aren't fooling anyone
because after the diploma comes the degree
and after the degree comes the american dream
marriage
divorce
a mid-life crisis
and then you work 'til you die (if you're lucky)

but for now I still have the stars in my eyes
and time can't rob me of the galaxy that I still contain
not yet, anyways

so I'll memorize the sound of my mother's voice
take pictures in my mind of my dad's chesire cat grin
I'll never forget how it feels when my sister wraps her little arms around me
or how my brother can always make me laugh

remember sleepovers in too small beds
remember concerts with your best friends
remember high school dances and cheap romances
and don't you dare forget how good it feels to live

because someday becomes today
and today becomes the past
the faces you know fade like a favorite pair of blue jeans
and everyone
everyone
leaves 

but the stars are always the same.

so for tonight I'll take the constellations as company

but

all stars burn out eventually







7 comments:

  1. One of the best posts I've ever read. Especially that opening. This was incredible sam.

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  2. Ooh this was so good! I love this post.

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  3. Yeah, but not for like billions of years, right?

    The stars, I mean.

    I guess what I'm saying is keep those stars in your eyes as long as you can. The fact that you're aware of all this is a good sign. Most people don't realize anything, and the next thing they know they're 50 and it all happened.

    You're going to be just fine, Sam. Just fine.

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  4. I know you probably wrote this to get it out, but it's amazing.. And exactly what I needed to read. Thank you.

    and don't you dare forget how good it feels to live

    $tolen

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  5. SAM I CAN'T EXPRESS HOW INCREDIBLE THIS WAS AH THE ENDING.

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  6. K wow I legit was going to leave the same comment that Jess just did. Like exact same with the all caps and everything. Anyways, SAM I CAN'T EXPRESS HOW INCREDIBLE THIS WAS AH THE ENDING.

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  7. This captured so many of my fears. One of the best things I've read all year. Okay I've got high school homework and I've stslked you back to April so I promise I'll stop but you're great just know that.

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